Okay, yesterday I have watched “dear john movie” and it inspire me to write down about my first love. XOXO
At grade 6, it was the first time Im falling in love with a boy, that’s so funny because I think I was too young having a crush! Hmmm…
The first time I know him, he was very annoying boy that I’ve ever met, his name is Rangga. I met him in a course because when I was 12 in 6th grade of elementary school, I’m taking course near my home, so the student there was children near from there. I mean my schoolmates didn’t go to the course that I was taking. So my first meeting in that course ruined because that boy so damn to me. He said that his school material didn’t same with me, and he forced the teacher to teach his subject, ironic. And then,I stay in the class during the break time. And one of the student in my class asked me, why don’t you go to canteen? And then I said “I’m in badmood”. “that must be because of rangga?” he replied. “yes, little bit”. And then he continued with saying a lot of shit to me,i didn’t care about his shit. I just feel mad, and I don’t want to meet that boy anymore…………
And the next meeting, I know his book same with mine. So his material must be the same with me. And after that he didn’t want to discuss about differences of material that we’re learning. The bad side of this course issssssssssss…………….. the girls of the class hate me surely. They hate me for the reason that make me sucks! You know what? They hate me because I sit in the first line.
Everyday they always see me like im a voldemort! I hate them, I know I was weird but this is so killing me, I don’t have friends there… and they ruined my mood to study. WHAT A CLASS!!!! And they keeping hate me everyday . then, one time in a class I was feel very mad for them, and i get angry then curse them in front of the class. Then I looking in their eyes, they were so scared of me. And they apologize to me.
And then time goes ….. until I have done Last Examination in Elementary School. And I take extended course to preparations goes to Junior High School. This course only take 30 days nonstop, and Rangga come to my class again. But, this so different because he looked me so deep inside my eyes. I can’t forget his sight on me. I always thinking about him everynight. And when he looked at me, my heart beat so fast and it makes me nervous. I don’t know what to do.
But I always want him to give that sight on me everytime. He always look at me like that, and that it become his habit and I feel so lost him when he didn’t come to the course, I miss his eyes. It makes me comfort to seeing his eyes. I miss him so much…… I know, this is not gonna happen… It’s gonna end by the course over.
I always sit in the first line of class, and then he sat 3 line behind me, so he can see me all day, when I looked to back I got his eyes looked at me, like it will never over. And I just stuck on my chair for a minute realized that eyes were real. And I whispered to god “thanks god you made his eyes so beautiful”.
One day, I came late, but when I got to the class he sat in first line of the class, I feel sad because he will not looked at me as usual. But then 15 minutes after that, he command all of the boys who sat at the first line to move to the chair the usually sat, and they asked the girl to sit in the first line as usual.
GOOOODDDDD I love this occasion.
And yeaaahh… after that, it was over. The course over and I will not having eyes contact again with him T.T I didn’t get broken heart, or got missing him so badly. Because I know, one day he will come back and found me. I know this is weird and so strange declare that Rangga loves me because only we’re having eyes contact for a month! But, this feeling so deep guys, even that was 5 years ago, I still cant forget about him. I feel llike he was live in my heart. and now, only fate will keep me back to the past.
and, it was August 17 2006. I celebrated Independence day of Indonesia in my cousin's house, and then, i met him. what a coincidence!!! i have chit chat for a minutes, and he said that he go to smpn 20. hmm, i always asked my friend who go to smpn 20 about him, but nobody knows :(
i searched him on google, but it doesn't work. because i dont know his full name, and then.. i'm tryin to search on facebook and friendster also the same..
until last year, i found his name in one of my ex's facebook. the notification is "your ex is now friend with your first love"LOLOLOLOLOLLLLL and then, directly i add him to my facebook. and yup! he confirm, but he was in a relationship and so do I.
and, there was a time, I chat with him and i hope he always remember about me, remember about the sight, remember about the memories.
it comes like this :
Me: hellooo... still remember me?
Him: uh, im sorry.. i dont know you.
Me: im a friend from elementary school.
Him: oh ... i didn't get it. hmm i'm sorry :(
Me: oh, that's okay then :D
That was the first time, and last time i was chat with him, yup it was March 2010. and I got the news he broke up with his girlfriend! huaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
i really want to be his girlfriend, sometimes i wanna broke up and then come to him, but it's impossible, because i really loves my boyfriend.
and he get another relationship with my friend of school.. yup! but, i dont care, i dont even jealous or something. i'm fine... coz I know, just know, my memories still the best part.
the last time when I met him after watching a basketball match. he was waiting for his girlfriend. and I see him directly in the eyes, and then he saw me just like 5 years ago, and it was real.. it was him, i know he changed a lot but his sight never get lost in my mind, and still the most beautiful one. he look at me deep so deep, and his eyes follows my movement until he can't see me in the dark night, it was 10 pm. But from this , my heart speaks "he remembers you".
but, okay reader.. maybe you all know him, or maybe 'rangga' read this.. i don't care, hey come on.... this is just for entertaining... I didn;t mean that "I LOVE HIM" or what, i just happy when i met my first love, realized he's still alive and happy it was good enough for me.
okay guys, thank you for your time to read this....
love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu all ~
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